Cast: Akshay Kumar, Kareena Kapoor; Director; Sabir Khan; Rating: 1 out of 5.
Filmmaking standards in Bollywood seem to have gone really high. Producers now opt for Sylvester Stallone over Sunny Deol for that mandatory special appearance in the climax as the messiah who saves the heroine from hoodlums. The shady second female fiddle who the heroine keeps abusing through the film has upgraded from Rakhi Sawant to Denise Richards. If that indirect insult to Hollywood still seems indicative, there is much more hardcore swearing in store.
The heroine and hero refer to each other as ‘dog’ and ‘bitch’ throughout. She adds that men have no IQ. Director Sabbir Khan either believes the same for his audience or is the species of men that the heroine is referring to. That’s because he treats the film with such childish cheekiness that you are amazed by the audacity with which the film offends the idea of entertainment.
Viraj (Akshay Kumar), an Indian stuntman working in Hollywood, is a compulsive womanizer who goes flirting around with every other woman in the town. Hey Baby, doesn’t that Akki sound familiar? For one good hour he goes on flirting outrageously with Simrita (Kareena Kapoor), a supermodel who is more of a mannequin with a disgusted face. The battle of sexes works adversely on your reflexes amidst jarring songs, commotional cake-fights, loud performances and toilet humour.
Miss Supermodel doubles up as a surgeon who, in an operation, leaves a timepiece inside stuntman’s stomach. With a story straight out of sensational tabloids, you helplessly watch the film ticking towards imminent disaster.
Suddenly the duo tries to woo each other just so that they can dump them later. Didn’t Kareena attempt the same with Akshaye in Hulchul ? The only one heartbroken is the viewer. Through a disjoint screenplay, constant continuity lapses and impassive chemistry between the couple, you realize that the film is heading nowhere. It also suffers from mood-swings as the supposed comedy changes tracks to emotional outbursts. Interestingly these are the most unintentionally funny portions where an inebriated Bebo justifies her male hatred.
What’s sad is that Kambakkht Ishq is a remake of Kamal Hassan’s Tamil film Pammal K. Sambandam (2002) and despite having a readymade rubbish reference point, the makers still couldn’t foresee the mess. Surprisingly four writers (Kiran Kotrial, Anvita Dutt Gupta, Ishita Mohitra, Sabbir Khan) are credited for the screenplay who end up spoiling the broth. Anvita’s dialogues are crude and crass at several instances complementing the literal toilet humour. There are unapologetic scenes where Akshay Kumar is (b)anally hauled or Amrita Arora gets farted on her face. Out of the blue, some patriotism and motherly love is abruptly induced to accommodate Sylvester Stallone in the script.
Akshay Kumar continues to repeat his customary comic act. Alas his spontaneity and improvisation fail to revive the hogwash script. Kareena Kapoor exaggerates and for god’s sake why does she have to reprise the dreadful ‘ Yeh Mera Dil ’ act in a self-spoof song ( Bebo Main Bebo, Dil Mera Lelo ). Imagine, Aftab Shivdasani is bearable in comparison. Amrita Arora seems to be tailor-made for dumb bimbo roles. Kirron Kher is getting repetitive and tiresomely typecast. Javed Jaffrey and Boman Irani ham hysterically and are pathetically wasted. The iconic Stallone seems jaded while Denise Richards appears aged. Vindu Dara Singh…oh why am I even mentioning him?
How one wishes producer Sajid Nadiadwala would have shown more consideration for a sane… rather some storyline than investing millions on highlighting Hollywood.
Alas this one is Dumb-akkht Ishq !
Source: Times of India